The Yes Gal

 There it is, on my desktop on this battered old laptop -my Borneo Flight Confirmation. No point in keeping it now, but me- being the ole sentimental that I am- cannot bring myself to delete it.

I'll never forget that feeling of pure exhilaration crossed with sheer panic as I pressed the 'confirm' button to pay for that flight. Sure, I'd already forked out the £250 deposit for the adventure but this....this made it feel frighteningly real. And exactly this time last year I was still feeling that pure exhilaration and panic. Will I be fit enough? Will I raise the money? Will I DIE?

Well, I didn't die. I ran through tiny Malaysian villages as the beautiful villagers cheered and waved. I got helicoptered into the dense Borneon Rainforest and built a camp there with my Teamies in the torrential, relentless jungle rain. I trekked miles and miles, over rope bridges, through rivers, navigating my way through the thick, lush foliage of the forest. I rafted on the rapids and jumped out of my raft into the meandering jungle river and let the current take me. I endured a painful and torturous bike/run relay in the blistering humidity, through padi fields and swamps, and cried and hugged 20 others at the finish who were as relieved as me to have survived it. I kayaked in the sea and round lagoons in perfect synch with my wonderful Kiwi team-mate. I drank white wine at the foot of a mountain, then ascended it the next day -the highest mountain in South East Asia. I saw the sun rise and the shadow of Mount Kinabalu against the trees of the jungle whilst sat far, far above the clouds. I skinny dipped in the sea and had the best party of my life with new friends that shared my unforgettable, irreplaceable experience.

Yes, I did all that. No, I didn't die. I did that and oh, much more. Man, I could laugh, cry, PUKE thinking about all the hilarious/ridiculous/terrifying/life-affirming/soul-blisteringly AWESOME things that happened.

This all came because I randomly said YES to myself. After looking enviously at the leaflet and wondering how these lucky people get to experience these amazing things and OH, POOR ME, MY LIFE'S BOOORING...... the revelation hit me like a ton of bricks. THERE IS NOTHING STOPPING ME.

At the time I'd only been at BMF a matter of months and had just run my first ever 5K race. So I wasn't exactly the pinnacle of fitness. And I only had 3 months to fundraise for charity, buy all my kit and save for my flight.

But Pete supported me. And I got a completely jammy and unexpected tax rebate.(Fate? God? Pure fucking JAM? Who knows??)

So I did it.

Pete calls me The Yes Man now. Because since that, I'll say yes to anything. Well, within reason. And things have been happening, opportunities presenting, a richness and happiness prevailing. And if a Spaz like me can do it................!!!

Next adventure? Borneo. Again. Not to race, to run past in a blur, a whirlwind. This time, a whole month in the rainforest to live with the beautiful indigenous folk that made me feel so welcome last time. A real adventure, planting trees, conserving wildlife. Immersing myself in their culture and considering my own.

I'm so happy. Less than 8 months and I'm back. I'm banishing them bad ole Borneo Blues.